Seventy-Fourth Entry
Even though none of you read Portuguese, I found the Big Brother Famosos web page which is the Portuguese version of Big Brother. The Famosos part implies that the houseguests are celebrities in Portugal. Very interesting. Big Brother Famosos. Check it out.
Today at work, I found out that the contract I am working on, which consists of two long asphalt overlay projects(with some road reconstruction) is due on October 28th. I know that I can get this Contract out in time, but hearing the exact deadline for the first time today made me nervous. I am somewhat scared. My first solo project needs to be a complete PS&E(Plans, Specs and E, whatever that is) deliverable on October 28th. Shiver me timbers!!!
Oh yeah, as I was going over the boilerplate for the contract today, I noticed that some of the addresses they spec'd for some of the products needed for roadway safety are completely wrong. Tomorrow, I have the daunting task of trying to call these folks and asking them for their correct address and making sure they still sell the items we need. ARRGH!!!
My brother said that he might be coming down to Tulare this weekend. He was supposed to go to San Diego again, but he found out that Lesters parents are going down there to visit. And partying with someones parents is never fun.
Tomorrow I am going to get up super early and drive to Fresno to get Krispy Kreme to bring to work. They are going to love me!!! That is if I get up on time...approx. 5:30 am.
10.10.2002
10.07.2002
Seventy-Third Entry
I was falling asleep at work today...AGAIN. I have been bedding down at about 7.5 hours before my alarm clock wakes me up, but I lay there forever.
I am soooo tired of my spare room being so messed up that I have to rotate between using the mouse and the keyboard on the same surface.
I have to do laundry before I run out of clothes this week. I will probably do it tomorrow after work. I forgot about it today.
I made a list of Big Ticket items I need to purchase before this house can be called a home...washing machine, guitar...
I need to find a dentist and pay a visit to my Blue Cross assigned doctor in Hanford. Its not that far...just like 20 minutes.
As has been happening a lot recently, my busiest time at work is the 1.5 hours before its time to leave.
Everyone watch Road Rules tonight. My friend Micah, from Boston called me to say that tonights season finale takes place at Cal Poly. Very cool.
Today, more than ever, I felt like a second class citizen at work. I just realized it this instant. I have the oldest computer, the poorest lit cube, no AutoCAD 2000(even if it is Lite). What is up with that?? I guess as long as they keep paying me.
This morning I was all psyched to have been invited to Jack Johnson concert by my then new best friend Jen, only to have my dreams busted into a million pieces after she tells me I can't go anymore cuz I'm not cool enough. :) Just kidding...just a case of miscommunication(hyphenated??)
Surprisingly, my whole house is clean except for the room the computer is in right now. I was looking for something earlier and somehow a grip of papers ended up on the floor. Hm.
I paid all my bills this month. Its good to be making decent money again.(When was I ever making decent money?)
I am going to cancel my cell service soon. The last bill was over $100. Shiver me timbers!!!
Does anyone have any suggestions for songs to download?? I got the new Kazaa and my rating is Supreme Being. I need to use that to my advantage.
I was thinking yesterday that after a few years, I would have just enough money to make a decent down payment on a house here. Picture it, 4br 2ba 2500sf home $150,000!!! Ohmigod!!!
If anyone can help, I have been looking for 2 music videos on the net to no avail...Teddybears STHLM - Rock n' Roll High School, and St. Germain - So Flute. If anyone comes across these vids, let me know!!
So thats it. My work week is 22.5% over. yea me.
I was falling asleep at work today...AGAIN. I have been bedding down at about 7.5 hours before my alarm clock wakes me up, but I lay there forever.
I am soooo tired of my spare room being so messed up that I have to rotate between using the mouse and the keyboard on the same surface.
I have to do laundry before I run out of clothes this week. I will probably do it tomorrow after work. I forgot about it today.
I made a list of Big Ticket items I need to purchase before this house can be called a home...washing machine, guitar...
I need to find a dentist and pay a visit to my Blue Cross assigned doctor in Hanford. Its not that far...just like 20 minutes.
As has been happening a lot recently, my busiest time at work is the 1.5 hours before its time to leave.
Everyone watch Road Rules tonight. My friend Micah, from Boston called me to say that tonights season finale takes place at Cal Poly. Very cool.
Today, more than ever, I felt like a second class citizen at work. I just realized it this instant. I have the oldest computer, the poorest lit cube, no AutoCAD 2000(even if it is Lite). What is up with that?? I guess as long as they keep paying me.
This morning I was all psyched to have been invited to Jack Johnson concert by my then new best friend Jen, only to have my dreams busted into a million pieces after she tells me I can't go anymore cuz I'm not cool enough. :) Just kidding...just a case of miscommunication(hyphenated??)
Surprisingly, my whole house is clean except for the room the computer is in right now. I was looking for something earlier and somehow a grip of papers ended up on the floor. Hm.
I paid all my bills this month. Its good to be making decent money again.(When was I ever making decent money?)
I am going to cancel my cell service soon. The last bill was over $100. Shiver me timbers!!!
Does anyone have any suggestions for songs to download?? I got the new Kazaa and my rating is Supreme Being. I need to use that to my advantage.
I was thinking yesterday that after a few years, I would have just enough money to make a decent down payment on a house here. Picture it, 4br 2ba 2500sf home $150,000!!! Ohmigod!!!
If anyone can help, I have been looking for 2 music videos on the net to no avail...Teddybears STHLM - Rock n' Roll High School, and St. Germain - So Flute. If anyone comes across these vids, let me know!!
So thats it. My work week is 22.5% over. yea me.
Seventy-Second Entry
It has been a little over a week since the last time I wrote something in my blog. Here goes.
A lot has happened since the last time I wrote:
- I have been spending a lot of time with my family here in Tulare. It is fun to hang out with all of them. My cousin made me biscuits and gravy the other night...yumm yumm. I am her fifth "child".
- My mom, aunt and uncle came to visit me this weekend. It was good to see them. We went to Visalia, yea. My mom cleaned my house...thats a major plus.
- My brother, on his way back from San Diego, passed through Tulare yesterday and paid me a visit. He came with his buddy Case. We went to grandmas and my aunts house also. He is actually considering moving to San Diego and has already put in a request for a transfer with his company. Very expense in SD.
- Things have been getting better at work. I feel like I know more about what I am supposed to be doing. I still think the pay sucks.
- The most disappointing thing of this week-point-five stretch of no writing has been a letter I got this weekend. They sent it to my house in San Leandro, and my mom brought it with her this weekend. Alameda County contacted me via mail, and informed me that I have an oral examination (interview) scheduled for this Friday at 2:50 pm. The reason this news is disappointing is because had I received this information about two weeks ago, I probably would have gone to my interview. Mo' Money, Mo' Money, Mo' Money...about $15000 more a year. But, ya know, I don't think I could go back to living at home again...so soon anyway. I like living on my own. Saving up money to buy furniture, having to take out my own trash to the curb, collecting the mail everyday, being independent. It may be costing me an extra $20000 per year over working in Alameda County, but I really like being on my own. And that's all I have to say about that.
Two weekends from now I am going up to the Bay Area and taking another cousin with me. She is going to cook a gourmet Portuguese dinner the night she gets to my parents house. MMMMMMMmmmmmmm....seafood cooked on a clay roof tile. Very cultural.
So yeah. I have only heard back from Jen and Lisa and Mylinh about coming to visit. And just to let you know, November might be a bad time to visit. Just pay attention to the weather forecasts and stuff and you will know. Or I will let you know.
See y'all in two weeks.
It has been a little over a week since the last time I wrote something in my blog. Here goes.
A lot has happened since the last time I wrote:
- I have been spending a lot of time with my family here in Tulare. It is fun to hang out with all of them. My cousin made me biscuits and gravy the other night...yumm yumm. I am her fifth "child".
- My mom, aunt and uncle came to visit me this weekend. It was good to see them. We went to Visalia, yea. My mom cleaned my house...thats a major plus.
- My brother, on his way back from San Diego, passed through Tulare yesterday and paid me a visit. He came with his buddy Case. We went to grandmas and my aunts house also. He is actually considering moving to San Diego and has already put in a request for a transfer with his company. Very expense in SD.
- Things have been getting better at work. I feel like I know more about what I am supposed to be doing. I still think the pay sucks.
- The most disappointing thing of this week-point-five stretch of no writing has been a letter I got this weekend. They sent it to my house in San Leandro, and my mom brought it with her this weekend. Alameda County contacted me via mail, and informed me that I have an oral examination (interview) scheduled for this Friday at 2:50 pm. The reason this news is disappointing is because had I received this information about two weeks ago, I probably would have gone to my interview. Mo' Money, Mo' Money, Mo' Money...about $15000 more a year. But, ya know, I don't think I could go back to living at home again...so soon anyway. I like living on my own. Saving up money to buy furniture, having to take out my own trash to the curb, collecting the mail everyday, being independent. It may be costing me an extra $20000 per year over working in Alameda County, but I really like being on my own. And that's all I have to say about that.
Two weekends from now I am going up to the Bay Area and taking another cousin with me. She is going to cook a gourmet Portuguese dinner the night she gets to my parents house. MMMMMMMmmmmmmm....seafood cooked on a clay roof tile. Very cultural.
So yeah. I have only heard back from Jen and Lisa and Mylinh about coming to visit. And just to let you know, November might be a bad time to visit. Just pay attention to the weather forecasts and stuff and you will know. Or I will let you know.
See y'all in two weeks.
9.28.2002
Seventy-First Entry
I just finished reading friedrice's livejournal, from the sept. 10th entry. Very fascinating trip. She also included a shout-out to my blog. If I could figure out how to put a link on my blog to hers I would...there it is...shout-out to lisa!!!!
For all those 3.5 people who read my blog, I would like to extend an invitation to my home in Tulare, California, the Heart of the Central Valley. It's more like the Armpit of the World, but its almost the same thing. So yeah, come on down.
I watched Run Lola Run on Bravo tonight. I absolutely love that movie, but I did not love it as much tonight because of all the commercials. It is such a fast paced movie, that the commercials slow it down quite a bit.
Oh, I read about Jen's camping trip with work, and her mention of Lex from Survivor got me thinking more about a Survivor weekend. At least 2.5 of you have heard me talk about the possibility of having a Survivor weekend, so if you are interested, let me know. Specifics...sometime early next spring(April, Early May), only lasting one weekend but maybe there is a three day weekend somewhere in there, probably a participation fee of $10-$20(depending on how many participants there are) which will go towards the final reward. The more serious I get about doing this Survivor weekend, the more I start to think about what happens if someone gets hurt or something. Details, details.
I just finished reading friedrice's livejournal, from the sept. 10th entry. Very fascinating trip. She also included a shout-out to my blog. If I could figure out how to put a link on my blog to hers I would...there it is...shout-out to lisa!!!!
For all those 3.5 people who read my blog, I would like to extend an invitation to my home in Tulare, California, the Heart of the Central Valley. It's more like the Armpit of the World, but its almost the same thing. So yeah, come on down.
I watched Run Lola Run on Bravo tonight. I absolutely love that movie, but I did not love it as much tonight because of all the commercials. It is such a fast paced movie, that the commercials slow it down quite a bit.
Oh, I read about Jen's camping trip with work, and her mention of Lex from Survivor got me thinking more about a Survivor weekend. At least 2.5 of you have heard me talk about the possibility of having a Survivor weekend, so if you are interested, let me know. Specifics...sometime early next spring(April, Early May), only lasting one weekend but maybe there is a three day weekend somewhere in there, probably a participation fee of $10-$20(depending on how many participants there are) which will go towards the final reward. The more serious I get about doing this Survivor weekend, the more I start to think about what happens if someone gets hurt or something. Details, details.
9.25.2002
Seventieth Entry
Tear...
Danielle got 2nd place on BB3 and Lisa won. The votes were 9-1, with Danielles one vote being...you guessed it, Jason.
It sucks that the evicted HG's were too emotionally disturbed by what Danielle did to see that by doing those things she played the game the best.
But whatever. I don't think I will ever get so involved in another reality TV show as I have in this one. Although, new episode of Survivor Thailand tomorrow...
I still can't believe that Josh and Amy did not vote for Danielle. There must have been something going on behind the scenes...ahhh...wishful thinking.
I am super tired. I think I am going to sleep.
I DLed the "new" Duncan Sheik song "On a high". It is pretty good. I am DLing the new Santana song feat. Michelle Branch. I heard it on the radio today, and it is pretty good. It is called "Game of Love" for those of you interested.
Yesterday there was a Changing Rooms marathon on BBC America. I love Digital Cable... I am making a tape of all the British TV stuff (primarily Changing Rooms) for a certain friend of mine that knows who she is...:)
I have been thinking about getting up really early one day this week and trekking out to Fresno and getting Krispy Kreme for everyone at work. But I have not been able to get up that early. I would have to be out the door by like 6am.
Oooo, Keeping up Appearances is on.
Tear...
Danielle got 2nd place on BB3 and Lisa won. The votes were 9-1, with Danielles one vote being...you guessed it, Jason.
It sucks that the evicted HG's were too emotionally disturbed by what Danielle did to see that by doing those things she played the game the best.
But whatever. I don't think I will ever get so involved in another reality TV show as I have in this one. Although, new episode of Survivor Thailand tomorrow...
I still can't believe that Josh and Amy did not vote for Danielle. There must have been something going on behind the scenes...ahhh...wishful thinking.
I am super tired. I think I am going to sleep.
I DLed the "new" Duncan Sheik song "On a high". It is pretty good. I am DLing the new Santana song feat. Michelle Branch. I heard it on the radio today, and it is pretty good. It is called "Game of Love" for those of you interested.
Yesterday there was a Changing Rooms marathon on BBC America. I love Digital Cable... I am making a tape of all the British TV stuff (primarily Changing Rooms) for a certain friend of mine that knows who she is...:)
I have been thinking about getting up really early one day this week and trekking out to Fresno and getting Krispy Kreme for everyone at work. But I have not been able to get up that early. I would have to be out the door by like 6am.
Oooo, Keeping up Appearances is on.
9.21.2002
Sixty-Ninth Entry
It has been four weeks since I have been working for Tulare County. In these past four weeks, I have learned a lot about working for the government. It is a very slow process with many checks and balances to keep things from going wrong. As a result, I find myself bored half the time. I need to think up ways to keep myself entertained for 9 hours a day (M-Th) and 4 hours on Friday. The projects I am working on are not due until six weeks from now, but they are already almost done. I inherited the projects from an Engineer that recently left on suspicious terms with the bosses...
But enough about my boring work.
Today I got Cable...Digital Cable no less, and am enjoying it. I also got a Cable Modem which is why I am able to write to the 3.5 people that read my blog on a regular basis. As a result of this injection of fresh technology into my life, I feel like I am settling into my life in Tulare very well. I am all set up in my living arrangement here.
It was interesting at first though...
I had to live at my grandparents house for two weeks before I could move into the place that I now call home. At first it was kind of awkward just because they are my grandparents, but I had a nice bed to sleep in and there was never any shortage of food. It was nice to live with them, watch them fight, listen to their stories and just hang out with them. I also got to watch a lot of Portuguese TV on RTPi which they get via satelite. It was interesting. When I needed a break or something from my grandparents house, I would go over to my Aunts house which is across town. We would just hang out and smoke. It was very cool.
I still go every once in a while and visit them. yahafta.
So...guess who is spending the night at my house tonight?? Louis! He left really late from the Bay and caught a ton of traffic on the way to Bakersfield to attend a conference so he couldn't make the 8pm deadline. So he stopped by and we ate Sonic and hung out.
Mylinh called me tonight. (censored) Anyway, just venting.
So yeah...to recap...
Job boring check
Cable Modem check
Digital Cable check
Tulare family check
Louis staying check
Upsetting phone call double check
See some of you this weekend. I will get to SL sometime between 8 and 9. Jen, if you read this, please, please, please tape BB3 for me and we will watch it this weekend!!! I need to know.
It has been four weeks since I have been working for Tulare County. In these past four weeks, I have learned a lot about working for the government. It is a very slow process with many checks and balances to keep things from going wrong. As a result, I find myself bored half the time. I need to think up ways to keep myself entertained for 9 hours a day (M-Th) and 4 hours on Friday. The projects I am working on are not due until six weeks from now, but they are already almost done. I inherited the projects from an Engineer that recently left on suspicious terms with the bosses...
But enough about my boring work.
Today I got Cable...Digital Cable no less, and am enjoying it. I also got a Cable Modem which is why I am able to write to the 3.5 people that read my blog on a regular basis. As a result of this injection of fresh technology into my life, I feel like I am settling into my life in Tulare very well. I am all set up in my living arrangement here.
It was interesting at first though...
I had to live at my grandparents house for two weeks before I could move into the place that I now call home. At first it was kind of awkward just because they are my grandparents, but I had a nice bed to sleep in and there was never any shortage of food. It was nice to live with them, watch them fight, listen to their stories and just hang out with them. I also got to watch a lot of Portuguese TV on RTPi which they get via satelite. It was interesting. When I needed a break or something from my grandparents house, I would go over to my Aunts house which is across town. We would just hang out and smoke. It was very cool.
I still go every once in a while and visit them. yahafta.
So...guess who is spending the night at my house tonight?? Louis! He left really late from the Bay and caught a ton of traffic on the way to Bakersfield to attend a conference so he couldn't make the 8pm deadline. So he stopped by and we ate Sonic and hung out.
Mylinh called me tonight. (censored) Anyway, just venting.
So yeah...to recap...
Job boring check
Cable Modem check
Digital Cable check
Tulare family check
Louis staying check
Upsetting phone call double check
See some of you this weekend. I will get to SL sometime between 8 and 9. Jen, if you read this, please, please, please tape BB3 for me and we will watch it this weekend!!! I need to know.
8.24.2002
Sixty-Eighth Entry
Today is my last day as a resident of San Leandro. In about an hour I begin my journey into the real world. Monday I start my new position at Tulare County as an Engineer I. I will be on my own with a rent to pay, bills to pay and air conditioning.
Its kinda sad to leave my birthplace (San Leandro) knowing that I might never return, other than to visit. All my friends and most of my family is here; I will miss them a lot. But I knew that this would happen eventually and am now rather looking forward to it. I get to experience all there is to experience as a "professional".
Hopefully new friends will be made, perhaps a marriage(or two), and I won't be alone. I have quite a lot of family in Tulare, so it won't be so bad, but they can only do so much with you.
Once I get settled in, in my new residence and job, I can return to the things I do a lot here in San Leandro...watching tons of TV, goofin' off on the net and putting hexes on Jason from BB3(not really, but I should). Soon Tulare will become home to me and it will be great.
To everyone who read this, I will miss you a lot, and come visit me!!
Bye
Today is my last day as a resident of San Leandro. In about an hour I begin my journey into the real world. Monday I start my new position at Tulare County as an Engineer I. I will be on my own with a rent to pay, bills to pay and air conditioning.
Its kinda sad to leave my birthplace (San Leandro) knowing that I might never return, other than to visit. All my friends and most of my family is here; I will miss them a lot. But I knew that this would happen eventually and am now rather looking forward to it. I get to experience all there is to experience as a "professional".
Hopefully new friends will be made, perhaps a marriage(or two), and I won't be alone. I have quite a lot of family in Tulare, so it won't be so bad, but they can only do so much with you.
Once I get settled in, in my new residence and job, I can return to the things I do a lot here in San Leandro...watching tons of TV, goofin' off on the net and putting hexes on Jason from BB3(not really, but I should). Soon Tulare will become home to me and it will be great.
To everyone who read this, I will miss you a lot, and come visit me!!
Bye
8.17.2002
Sixty-Seventh Entry
A whoooooooole lot has happened since I last wrote.
-I got a job.
-I have driven close to 2000 miles.
-I have developed a new addiction.
-I got a job.
I found out on Monday, August 5th while Louis and Lamar were at my house using my brothers computer to work on Louis' campaign statement. I got a job working with the County of Tulare as an Engineer 1. I waited a while before I told anyone because I wanted to do it all at the same time. I wanted everyone to go with me to Margies Diner in Salinas, but only 4 people could go. Thats alright, we went anyway, and I told everyone else at other times during the day. I am extremely happy that I have finally got a job and that I now get to live near my family in Tulare. I am not exactly sure as to what I will be doing, but I know that it is engineering related. My first day is August 26th, but it will only be an orientation day. I get to watch a lot of videos and fill out paperwork about them. They probably have to do with work safety and sexual harassment type things.
-I have driven close to 2000 miles.
As a result of my new job, I have been to Tulare 3 times in just 2 weeks. Once for my second interview, once to fill out the paperwork like W4 and stuff as well as take a county physical, and once to check out some places to live. Compounded with driving Firmino to and from practice in Livermore for a whole week and various outings, that adds up to about 2000 miles. And there are so many more miles to be driven by me(moving, visiting, etc.) By the way, I liked the apartment I saw and will be moving into it in the middle of September.
-I have developed a new addiction.
And this addiction is to Big Brother 3 Updates on the web. www.bb3updates.com is the website that I frequent about a dozen times a day to find out the latest from the people who have the live feeds over the internet. The TV show has just become the icing on the cake as far as I'm concerned. But, for the few weeks that I am not going to have internet, when I am at my grandmothers house, I am going to suffer severe withdrawals. Oh well, I guess I will have to find out about BB happenings the old fashioned way by watching the show.
I am severely rooting for a Danielle, Jason and Amy/Lisa final three. I fear that one of these will be replaced with Gerry. Everyone thinks they can beat Gerry in the final two.
I am very afraid to find out who Amy will nominate tomorrow. She is leaning toward Jason and Chiara. Marcellas does not want to look like he is trying to change Amy's decision which makes me think that he would be OK with Jason leaving. What happened to the alliance??? If it wasn't for Roddy pulling Amy's strings, Jason would have been no where near the chopping block. If Jason is nominated, Roddy will waste no time painting him out to be a bad guy like he did with his 'fake' attack on Josh. Roddy wanted to ensure that Josh get evicted so he yelled at him and before long the scene was like a Two-Minute Hate from 1984 with Marcellas yelling at him too. Roddy needs to go now, I blame it all on him.
And what is it with this Lisa flirting with Roddy thing? Is she trying to play him, or is he charming her into his dark side?? Too much going on. Its like slowing down to gawk at a car accident on the road.
A whoooooooole lot has happened since I last wrote.
-I got a job.
-I have driven close to 2000 miles.
-I have developed a new addiction.
-I got a job.
I found out on Monday, August 5th while Louis and Lamar were at my house using my brothers computer to work on Louis' campaign statement. I got a job working with the County of Tulare as an Engineer 1. I waited a while before I told anyone because I wanted to do it all at the same time. I wanted everyone to go with me to Margies Diner in Salinas, but only 4 people could go. Thats alright, we went anyway, and I told everyone else at other times during the day. I am extremely happy that I have finally got a job and that I now get to live near my family in Tulare. I am not exactly sure as to what I will be doing, but I know that it is engineering related. My first day is August 26th, but it will only be an orientation day. I get to watch a lot of videos and fill out paperwork about them. They probably have to do with work safety and sexual harassment type things.
-I have driven close to 2000 miles.
As a result of my new job, I have been to Tulare 3 times in just 2 weeks. Once for my second interview, once to fill out the paperwork like W4 and stuff as well as take a county physical, and once to check out some places to live. Compounded with driving Firmino to and from practice in Livermore for a whole week and various outings, that adds up to about 2000 miles. And there are so many more miles to be driven by me(moving, visiting, etc.) By the way, I liked the apartment I saw and will be moving into it in the middle of September.
-I have developed a new addiction.
And this addiction is to Big Brother 3 Updates on the web. www.bb3updates.com is the website that I frequent about a dozen times a day to find out the latest from the people who have the live feeds over the internet. The TV show has just become the icing on the cake as far as I'm concerned. But, for the few weeks that I am not going to have internet, when I am at my grandmothers house, I am going to suffer severe withdrawals. Oh well, I guess I will have to find out about BB happenings the old fashioned way by watching the show.
I am severely rooting for a Danielle, Jason and Amy/Lisa final three. I fear that one of these will be replaced with Gerry. Everyone thinks they can beat Gerry in the final two.
I am very afraid to find out who Amy will nominate tomorrow. She is leaning toward Jason and Chiara. Marcellas does not want to look like he is trying to change Amy's decision which makes me think that he would be OK with Jason leaving. What happened to the alliance??? If it wasn't for Roddy pulling Amy's strings, Jason would have been no where near the chopping block. If Jason is nominated, Roddy will waste no time painting him out to be a bad guy like he did with his 'fake' attack on Josh. Roddy wanted to ensure that Josh get evicted so he yelled at him and before long the scene was like a Two-Minute Hate from 1984 with Marcellas yelling at him too. Roddy needs to go now, I blame it all on him.
And what is it with this Lisa flirting with Roddy thing? Is she trying to play him, or is he charming her into his dark side?? Too much going on. Its like slowing down to gawk at a car accident on the road.
8.01.2002
Sixty-Sixth Entry
In my last entry, I set quite a few lofty goals. Two, in particular, I have not been successful at...the quit smoking, and the cold calling. I have been more conscious of how much I smoke recently, and as a result am starting to cut down. The whole cold calling thing was just too scary to handle, but I have been sending in applications to potential employers everyday.
So...Lisa, Amy, Mylinh and sometimes Carolyn. I am happy that my readership has slowly grown from 1 to 3.5. Maybe I should have a dancing bear in the corner of this page to attract readers. Maybe I'll throw a virtual BBQ so I can invite more people to read.
2 more days and Mylinh will be back to the States. I get to pick her up at the lovely SFO airport. I have been waiting for this day forever!!
Amy told me on our Wednesday walk that it took her 6 months to find a job. I guess I shouldn't expect to get a job right away, but it would be nice to get one, or at least several very promising leads before the end of August. We'll see.
If anyone is ever home at 3pm on a weekday, you must watch Good Day Live on CBS 5. It is the most hilarious daytime show since, since,... I don't know when. Dorothy, Steve, and Jillian are the best daytime team ever. It is a laugh a second with these guys. It is a testament to how easygoing and jaded LA really is. I saw the show every once in a while when I lived in SLO, since on cable we got all the LA stations, but that was before they were syndicated. I love it!!!
Big Brother 3 tonight was no big shocker as far as the eviction was concerned. I won't say I was happy to see Amy go, but I think she did deserve it more than Marcellas. But I was surprised to see how much Eric wanted to get HOH. I am willing to bet millions that he would've put up Danielle and Jason for eviction. But how stupid was he to think that Amy, Lori and Tonya totalled 200 some-odd inches in height?? That would have made each of them about 7 feet tall!! What a dumb ass. I think Gerry is in a good position here...he has evaded another chance at being evicted. I feel pretty confident that he will nominate Lisa and Danielle for eviction to get in good with Roddy, Josh and Marcellas. Eric won't be too happy, but he'll get over it...his one brain cell can only handle a few thoughts at a time. And of course Jason will be heartbroken that Danielle is nominated, but unless he wins the power of veto, all he can do is pray...more than he has been.
Tomorrow, I am going to try to finish shooting the movie at my cousins house. I think tomorrow I am going to die...in the movie.
Any ideas on what to do tomorrow night??
In my last entry, I set quite a few lofty goals. Two, in particular, I have not been successful at...the quit smoking, and the cold calling. I have been more conscious of how much I smoke recently, and as a result am starting to cut down. The whole cold calling thing was just too scary to handle, but I have been sending in applications to potential employers everyday.
So...Lisa, Amy, Mylinh and sometimes Carolyn. I am happy that my readership has slowly grown from 1 to 3.5. Maybe I should have a dancing bear in the corner of this page to attract readers. Maybe I'll throw a virtual BBQ so I can invite more people to read.
2 more days and Mylinh will be back to the States. I get to pick her up at the lovely SFO airport. I have been waiting for this day forever!!
Amy told me on our Wednesday walk that it took her 6 months to find a job. I guess I shouldn't expect to get a job right away, but it would be nice to get one, or at least several very promising leads before the end of August. We'll see.
If anyone is ever home at 3pm on a weekday, you must watch Good Day Live on CBS 5. It is the most hilarious daytime show since, since,... I don't know when. Dorothy, Steve, and Jillian are the best daytime team ever. It is a laugh a second with these guys. It is a testament to how easygoing and jaded LA really is. I saw the show every once in a while when I lived in SLO, since on cable we got all the LA stations, but that was before they were syndicated. I love it!!!
Big Brother 3 tonight was no big shocker as far as the eviction was concerned. I won't say I was happy to see Amy go, but I think she did deserve it more than Marcellas. But I was surprised to see how much Eric wanted to get HOH. I am willing to bet millions that he would've put up Danielle and Jason for eviction. But how stupid was he to think that Amy, Lori and Tonya totalled 200 some-odd inches in height?? That would have made each of them about 7 feet tall!! What a dumb ass. I think Gerry is in a good position here...he has evaded another chance at being evicted. I feel pretty confident that he will nominate Lisa and Danielle for eviction to get in good with Roddy, Josh and Marcellas. Eric won't be too happy, but he'll get over it...his one brain cell can only handle a few thoughts at a time. And of course Jason will be heartbroken that Danielle is nominated, but unless he wins the power of veto, all he can do is pray...more than he has been.
Tomorrow, I am going to try to finish shooting the movie at my cousins house. I think tomorrow I am going to die...in the movie.
Any ideas on what to do tomorrow night??
7.26.2002
Sixty-Fifth Entry
I can't sleep. The last coupla nights I have had a hard time sleeping. I am trying to get to bed earlier than I have been, but it isn't working too successfully. As a result, I find myself thinking about stuff which I will vent to my 3.5 readers.
1. I have never been more serious about my health than I am right now. I have thought of the things I need to do to become a healthier person. As of tomorrow, I am going to quit smoking. Not for a few days, not for a few weeks, forever. Quitting smoking will be tough, but not as tough as my next goal. I am going to lose 50lbs by Christmas. That is about 10lbs per month. That goal does not sound that hard, but coupled with the extra eating from quitting smoking, it will be quite a challenge. I am going to stop eating at all fast food joints(save monthly In n' Out) and greasy spoon restaurants(including Prings, Denny's and Carrows) unless I just get a beverage. I will exercise more than just 3 times a week. This will include a daily routine of sit-ups, push-ups, more walking and running and whatever else I can do like use my bros weights. By the end of the year, I will run an 8 minute mile. 8 mins ain't that great, but its close to half the time I can do it in now. Somebody print this out.
2. I need to get a job. I need a job more than I need air to breathe. My money is running short and my parents won't like me asking them for money. I tried today to start my "cold calling", but I got too nervous and didn't do it. I decided that I need a start date, and an end date. I will start cold calling next Monday, the 29th of July and end on Friday, the 9th of August. That gives me two weeks which is ample time to do the calling, and send out all the necessaries that go along with the calling. I need to buy new interview clothes. They always say, you need to spend money to make money. Somebody print this out.
There, I've said it. That is pretty much all I have been thinking about, save for a few thoughts that should stay in the bedroom...hehe.
8 days n' counting...
I can't sleep. The last coupla nights I have had a hard time sleeping. I am trying to get to bed earlier than I have been, but it isn't working too successfully. As a result, I find myself thinking about stuff which I will vent to my 3.5 readers.
1. I have never been more serious about my health than I am right now. I have thought of the things I need to do to become a healthier person. As of tomorrow, I am going to quit smoking. Not for a few days, not for a few weeks, forever. Quitting smoking will be tough, but not as tough as my next goal. I am going to lose 50lbs by Christmas. That is about 10lbs per month. That goal does not sound that hard, but coupled with the extra eating from quitting smoking, it will be quite a challenge. I am going to stop eating at all fast food joints(save monthly In n' Out) and greasy spoon restaurants(including Prings, Denny's and Carrows) unless I just get a beverage. I will exercise more than just 3 times a week. This will include a daily routine of sit-ups, push-ups, more walking and running and whatever else I can do like use my bros weights. By the end of the year, I will run an 8 minute mile. 8 mins ain't that great, but its close to half the time I can do it in now. Somebody print this out.
2. I need to get a job. I need a job more than I need air to breathe. My money is running short and my parents won't like me asking them for money. I tried today to start my "cold calling", but I got too nervous and didn't do it. I decided that I need a start date, and an end date. I will start cold calling next Monday, the 29th of July and end on Friday, the 9th of August. That gives me two weeks which is ample time to do the calling, and send out all the necessaries that go along with the calling. I need to buy new interview clothes. They always say, you need to spend money to make money. Somebody print this out.
There, I've said it. That is pretty much all I have been thinking about, save for a few thoughts that should stay in the bedroom...hehe.
8 days n' counting...
7.24.2002
Sixty-Third Entry
Bullfight on Monday was uber-cool. I had a lot of fun and I think 50% of the asians there did also. They only had one good guy on horseback, the other horse guy was an apprentice who sucked.
I sent in two applications today for employment. That makes a total of 4 sent out this week. Katie gave me the idea to print out internet yellow page listings for all the firms in the area. And that leaves me with three choices:
1. Faxing everyone my resume and cover letter
2. Sending everyone my resume and cover letter
3. "Cold calling" everyone first to see if they will even look at my resume and then sending it to them via either fax or mail.
I am leaning towards number 3. Number 1 is just way too impersonal, if they aren't expecting it they will treat it as a fax ad and throw it out, it costs like $1 per sheet to fax at Kinkos, but it is quick, quick, quick. Number 2 is more personal than number one, but if they aren't expecting it...garbage, I will spend 37-60 cents per set, but it too is a quick way of doing it. By using number 3, I can gauge interest, I can find out who they are looking for(if anyone), save money on postage and faxing by only sending a set to those who want it. On the other hand it will take longer, I will have to pay for the phone calls, and I will have to learn a little something about their company so I don't sound stupid on the phone.
I think I will do number 3. It is time-consuming, but very cost-effective. Wish me luck!!
Bullfight on Monday was uber-cool. I had a lot of fun and I think 50% of the asians there did also. They only had one good guy on horseback, the other horse guy was an apprentice who sucked.
I sent in two applications today for employment. That makes a total of 4 sent out this week. Katie gave me the idea to print out internet yellow page listings for all the firms in the area. And that leaves me with three choices:
1. Faxing everyone my resume and cover letter
2. Sending everyone my resume and cover letter
3. "Cold calling" everyone first to see if they will even look at my resume and then sending it to them via either fax or mail.
I am leaning towards number 3. Number 1 is just way too impersonal, if they aren't expecting it they will treat it as a fax ad and throw it out, it costs like $1 per sheet to fax at Kinkos, but it is quick, quick, quick. Number 2 is more personal than number one, but if they aren't expecting it...garbage, I will spend 37-60 cents per set, but it too is a quick way of doing it. By using number 3, I can gauge interest, I can find out who they are looking for(if anyone), save money on postage and faxing by only sending a set to those who want it. On the other hand it will take longer, I will have to pay for the phone calls, and I will have to learn a little something about their company so I don't sound stupid on the phone.
I think I will do number 3. It is time-consuming, but very cost-effective. Wish me luck!!
7.18.2002
Sixty-Second Entry
Well, I don't really know what to write, but I feel like I should. My readership is up to three, thanks Amy.
I have been on a somewhat successful health kick in recent days. I have been counting calories and eating less and trying to exercise more. I don't feel tired all the time due to a possible calorie shortage; that tells me I've been eating too much. I am trying to better commit myself to walking 3 times a week with Amy and am starting a regiment of situps and pushups. That should help out too.
Things I need to work on...going to sleep earlier, and getting up earlier. I am down to waking up at 9:15am. Which is better than the average noon time reveille that I have become accustomed to....I also need to stop eating a midnight snack. Last night was a small bowl of cereal.
I guess the deal with weight loss is that it isn't instantaneous. I am the type of person who likes things that are instantaneous, probably due to my proximity to all the things that I need and provide instant gratification like: food, music, my computer and porn(j/k...or am I).
Once I work out enough, and eat right enough, I will look better and feel a lot better. Until then, I will just have to work at it and know that the end result will be satisfying.
Well, I don't really know what to write, but I feel like I should. My readership is up to three, thanks Amy.
I have been on a somewhat successful health kick in recent days. I have been counting calories and eating less and trying to exercise more. I don't feel tired all the time due to a possible calorie shortage; that tells me I've been eating too much. I am trying to better commit myself to walking 3 times a week with Amy and am starting a regiment of situps and pushups. That should help out too.
Things I need to work on...going to sleep earlier, and getting up earlier. I am down to waking up at 9:15am. Which is better than the average noon time reveille that I have become accustomed to....I also need to stop eating a midnight snack. Last night was a small bowl of cereal.
I guess the deal with weight loss is that it isn't instantaneous. I am the type of person who likes things that are instantaneous, probably due to my proximity to all the things that I need and provide instant gratification like: food, music, my computer and porn(j/k...or am I).
Once I work out enough, and eat right enough, I will look better and feel a lot better. Until then, I will just have to work at it and know that the end result will be satisfying.
7.15.2002
Sixty-First Entry
Mamma Mia!!
It was the funniest, greatest, most excellent performance I have ever seen on any stage! It was the ultimate best!! I feel lucky that I was able to be a part of such a wonderful experience! The seats were great, and the crowd was really getting into it. Someone sitting to my left was even singing along! She must have been a die hard fan!!
I got all spiffed up for the show. It was cool to get all dressed up for an evening theatre performance in The City. I felt rich or something...
Mamma Mia!!
It was the funniest, greatest, most excellent performance I have ever seen on any stage! It was the ultimate best!! I feel lucky that I was able to be a part of such a wonderful experience! The seats were great, and the crowd was really getting into it. Someone sitting to my left was even singing along! She must have been a die hard fan!!
I got all spiffed up for the show. It was cool to get all dressed up for an evening theatre performance in The City. I felt rich or something...
7.10.2002
Sixtieth Entry
Agenda
1. Talk about beach journey yesterday and todays heat.
2. Talk about what is really killing me right now.
1.
Yesterday was great fun. Lisa, Carolyn and I all headed out to Half Moon Bay for some fun in the sun. I almost died twice, Carolyn and Lisa almost died once.
We dug a hole over 6 feet deep. I was in it. It was really cool. I kinda wanted to dig a tunnel out of it, but I was sort of afraid of the whole tunnel caving in and burying me alive. How tragic!!! I was in there for about an hour digging the hole deeper and deeper. Then it took about a half-hour to get out. That was the first time I almost died...I was trapped in the hole. The second time I almost died, was when I was convinced by Lisa and Carolyn to bury me up to my head in the hole (actually, there was very little convincing needed). As I was digging my way out, I got a massive cramp in my right leg. I almost died.
I dried and desanded my pants and shirt, and then we headed off to Palo Alto to have dinner with Jen. She took us to the Pasta Market and it was good. Then we went to Trader Joes, and then home.
Today was wicked hot and I did not leave the house all day. I stayed home and watched the Real World Chicago marathon all the way until it culminated with the Season Finale of the show. It was a good season in my book.
2.
I need a girlfriend. I need someone who will satisfy my physical desires, and my emotional and mental desires. I want a girl who will love me for me. I want a girl who does not take herself too seriously. I want a girl to hold at night and is not afraid to be held. I want a girl to talk to about anything and everything without fearing any backlash. I want a girl I can hold hands with, kiss, hug at the movies, park or restaurant. I want a girl who is not afraid to be herself around me. I want a girl who will challenge me mentally, support me emotionally, and satisfy me physically. I want a girl who will make me feel less alone. She will be the perfect girl.
I want her so badly.
Maybe it was watching the Real World marathon on MTV. All these relationships on the TV, maybe it got me thinking that I want that. I want a Cara or a Keri at my side.
Or maybe it was my Boston friend Micah who called me tonight and when I mentioned my Real World watching today told me that I needed to get a life and a girlfriend. She is right. I need a girlfriend. I need someone who can take the place of watching TV by hanging out with me.
But even as I write this, I feel an almost overwhelming sense of doom looming over me. I probably will never find a girl with all the qualities I mentioned above. There is no such thing as The Perfect Girl. Plus, there are almost no girls that will go out with an unemployed, overweight, and apathetic person like me. Am I trapped forever in this life of mine, destined to go on alone?? Or am I more like a butterfly who is going to emerge from his cocoon as a completely changed being?? I don't know. I guess I'll get out of it about as much as I put into it.
I suppose I know what the answer should be...the latter one about the butterfly. I need to get motivated and change my life around. But with each attempt at motivating myself, comes the inevitable feeling that the task at hand is too overwhelming, which causes me to return to my old and tired self. Sad but true. I don't know why I do that. I don't lose interest in losing weight or finding a job, its just that the task seems too too overwhelming so I quit.
I think that too applies to the area of finding the love of my life. The task of finding the "one" seems too overwhelming to me. Who is to say that I haven't already met her and let her pass? Who is to say that she is right under my nose? Who is to say that she could be working at my next job?
So yeah, I want and need a girlfriend.
Agenda
1. Talk about beach journey yesterday and todays heat.
2. Talk about what is really killing me right now.
1.
Yesterday was great fun. Lisa, Carolyn and I all headed out to Half Moon Bay for some fun in the sun. I almost died twice, Carolyn and Lisa almost died once.
We dug a hole over 6 feet deep. I was in it. It was really cool. I kinda wanted to dig a tunnel out of it, but I was sort of afraid of the whole tunnel caving in and burying me alive. How tragic!!! I was in there for about an hour digging the hole deeper and deeper. Then it took about a half-hour to get out. That was the first time I almost died...I was trapped in the hole. The second time I almost died, was when I was convinced by Lisa and Carolyn to bury me up to my head in the hole (actually, there was very little convincing needed). As I was digging my way out, I got a massive cramp in my right leg. I almost died.
I dried and desanded my pants and shirt, and then we headed off to Palo Alto to have dinner with Jen. She took us to the Pasta Market and it was good. Then we went to Trader Joes, and then home.
Today was wicked hot and I did not leave the house all day. I stayed home and watched the Real World Chicago marathon all the way until it culminated with the Season Finale of the show. It was a good season in my book.
2.
I need a girlfriend. I need someone who will satisfy my physical desires, and my emotional and mental desires. I want a girl who will love me for me. I want a girl who does not take herself too seriously. I want a girl to hold at night and is not afraid to be held. I want a girl to talk to about anything and everything without fearing any backlash. I want a girl I can hold hands with, kiss, hug at the movies, park or restaurant. I want a girl who is not afraid to be herself around me. I want a girl who will challenge me mentally, support me emotionally, and satisfy me physically. I want a girl who will make me feel less alone. She will be the perfect girl.
I want her so badly.
Maybe it was watching the Real World marathon on MTV. All these relationships on the TV, maybe it got me thinking that I want that. I want a Cara or a Keri at my side.
Or maybe it was my Boston friend Micah who called me tonight and when I mentioned my Real World watching today told me that I needed to get a life and a girlfriend. She is right. I need a girlfriend. I need someone who can take the place of watching TV by hanging out with me.
But even as I write this, I feel an almost overwhelming sense of doom looming over me. I probably will never find a girl with all the qualities I mentioned above. There is no such thing as The Perfect Girl. Plus, there are almost no girls that will go out with an unemployed, overweight, and apathetic person like me. Am I trapped forever in this life of mine, destined to go on alone?? Or am I more like a butterfly who is going to emerge from his cocoon as a completely changed being?? I don't know. I guess I'll get out of it about as much as I put into it.
I suppose I know what the answer should be...the latter one about the butterfly. I need to get motivated and change my life around. But with each attempt at motivating myself, comes the inevitable feeling that the task at hand is too overwhelming, which causes me to return to my old and tired self. Sad but true. I don't know why I do that. I don't lose interest in losing weight or finding a job, its just that the task seems too too overwhelming so I quit.
I think that too applies to the area of finding the love of my life. The task of finding the "one" seems too overwhelming to me. Who is to say that I haven't already met her and let her pass? Who is to say that she is right under my nose? Who is to say that she could be working at my next job?
So yeah, I want and need a girlfriend.
7.06.2002
Fifty-Ninth Entry
Interesting week to report on. I went to the beach on Tuesday. It was a lot of fun but it was rather cold. For some reason the great weather from Monday did not continue into Tuesday. I went with Lisa. After making our usual stop at Pebble Beach (and discovering that the whale carcass was still there, only this time it was purple and half eaten) we went to Bean Hollow beach a little further south along Hwy 1. There, we set up camp, and started to build a sand city. We set up the city's Civic Center atop the sand ridge overlooking the ocean. Then we built a long road to where we would build our first subdivision. Then Lisa wanted to explore, so I just finished building the city. I built three subdivisions each with three giant houses.
It got cold, so then we went to Pescadero Beach and messed around in the tide pools. We rescued a dead starfish. We named him Patrick in honor of Patrick the starfish on Spongebob Squarepants. Then we left and ate lunch with Carolyn at Los Pericos. mmmm
On Wednesday night, Lisa, Louis, Jen, Dayni and I went to Karaoke in Hayward. It was fun. I didn't feel like watching a movie afterwards so I went home.
On the fourth of July, Thursday, Jen, Dayni, Dario and I went to Joaquin Miller park in Oak-town and hiked. It was tiring, but fun!! Then I came home and had a BBQ with family. Then SLO friend Katy called and asked me if I had any plans for that night. I was all no, not really. Then she's all, you should come to the city and hang out. I was like, sure! I picked her up and we went to this hill on Twin Peaks rd. There were a lot of people there and it was pretty windy, but we could see fireworks from all over the Bay Area. It was really cool. Then we went to her place for a little while. She has a nice place. Then I went home.
On Friday (yesterday), Lisa, Jen and I went to Fairfield mainly for me to partake of a lovely meal at my favorite comfort food place, Chick-Fil-A. It was really good!! Just like I remembered it!!! Then we cruised the Westfield mall and I bought some CD's at Best Buy. It was fun. After getting back to the considerably cooler Bay Shore, we stopped at Ikea and I bought some spotlights for my new bookshelf. They really look nice at night. During the day time, you really cant see how nice they look. Its like a light from God shining down on my wall (chorus of angels). After Ikea, I got lost in Oakland and we ended up going to Chinatown. It was nice there. We got pearl tea. It was the worst pearl tea I have ever tasted. I got home and called Amy to go walking. She is sick though, so there was no walking.
I thought we were all going to go do something last night, but I was never called. Oh well, I kept myself busy counting the number of carpet fibers in my room. I kept losing count after like 1000. Oh well.
Hopefully tonight will be better. There was some buzz about going to 550 something or other, but that sounds way bunk. I guess I can watch Trading Spaces tonight!!!
Interesting week to report on. I went to the beach on Tuesday. It was a lot of fun but it was rather cold. For some reason the great weather from Monday did not continue into Tuesday. I went with Lisa. After making our usual stop at Pebble Beach (and discovering that the whale carcass was still there, only this time it was purple and half eaten) we went to Bean Hollow beach a little further south along Hwy 1. There, we set up camp, and started to build a sand city. We set up the city's Civic Center atop the sand ridge overlooking the ocean. Then we built a long road to where we would build our first subdivision. Then Lisa wanted to explore, so I just finished building the city. I built three subdivisions each with three giant houses.
It got cold, so then we went to Pescadero Beach and messed around in the tide pools. We rescued a dead starfish. We named him Patrick in honor of Patrick the starfish on Spongebob Squarepants. Then we left and ate lunch with Carolyn at Los Pericos. mmmm
On Wednesday night, Lisa, Louis, Jen, Dayni and I went to Karaoke in Hayward. It was fun. I didn't feel like watching a movie afterwards so I went home.
On the fourth of July, Thursday, Jen, Dayni, Dario and I went to Joaquin Miller park in Oak-town and hiked. It was tiring, but fun!! Then I came home and had a BBQ with family. Then SLO friend Katy called and asked me if I had any plans for that night. I was all no, not really. Then she's all, you should come to the city and hang out. I was like, sure! I picked her up and we went to this hill on Twin Peaks rd. There were a lot of people there and it was pretty windy, but we could see fireworks from all over the Bay Area. It was really cool. Then we went to her place for a little while. She has a nice place. Then I went home.
On Friday (yesterday), Lisa, Jen and I went to Fairfield mainly for me to partake of a lovely meal at my favorite comfort food place, Chick-Fil-A. It was really good!! Just like I remembered it!!! Then we cruised the Westfield mall and I bought some CD's at Best Buy. It was fun. After getting back to the considerably cooler Bay Shore, we stopped at Ikea and I bought some spotlights for my new bookshelf. They really look nice at night. During the day time, you really cant see how nice they look. Its like a light from God shining down on my wall (chorus of angels). After Ikea, I got lost in Oakland and we ended up going to Chinatown. It was nice there. We got pearl tea. It was the worst pearl tea I have ever tasted. I got home and called Amy to go walking. She is sick though, so there was no walking.
I thought we were all going to go do something last night, but I was never called. Oh well, I kept myself busy counting the number of carpet fibers in my room. I kept losing count after like 1000. Oh well.
Hopefully tonight will be better. There was some buzz about going to 550 something or other, but that sounds way bunk. I guess I can watch Trading Spaces tonight!!!
7.02.2002
Fifty-Eighth Entry
Tonight has been a night of intense thought for me. I rarely ever sit and think for long periods of time. I thought about my goals in life, my current situation in life and my past experiences in life. I thought about my career, my friends and family, and my more-than-friends relationship(s). The latter part (relationships) caused me to think the most.
I found myself reflecting on my most recent romantic involvement and what went wrong. We had it good in many ways: we enjoyed each others company, we always had a good time together, we both had basically the same ideals where family and friends were concerned, we both want and strive to be career oriented. There was, and still is, a lot of chemistry between us.
What didn't jive, at least for me, was her religious and spiritual place in life. I am no where near her level of spirituality and, what I sometimes call, belief of the unknown. She is a woman who takes her life and treats it as a vessel for God to do his bidding. Although I believe in God, it is to a much lesser extent than her; I flip-flop between a lax Catholic and an agnostic. After having a college experience where a majority of my friends were practicing Christians, I have seen the positives in having such a strong belief in God and his ways. I however, have not been able to become as "believing" as they were.
I ended the relationship because I knew that she and I would only be truly happy with people of our own spirituality. Our two different beliefs would lead us to two completely different ways of life.
But tonight, I was thinking. Why do you date someone? Why do you marry someone as opposed to someone else? Does your belief system really matter?
1. Why do you date someone?
The reason you date someone is because you take an interest in the person you are dating. Simple, but true. It could be because she is funny, it could be because you share a lot of hobbies or interests, or it could be because she is great in bed. You obviously see a quality in that person that you would like to see more of.
2. Why do you marry someone as opposed to someone else?
Compatibility on issues such as goals in life, raising a family; in general, the potential symbiosis of your lives. The love bit of a serious relationship will always be there regardless so when looking at this scientifically (which is kind of an oxy-moron, because there is nothing scientific about love), it can just drop out of the equation and basically becomes a non-issue. The dating process should expose a person to enough potential mates to where you know who you want and just go after her. The more you date, the more likely you are to come across your most compatible match.
3. Does your belief system really matter?
Although I do not believe that heavily in God and the bible, I do think that a persons belief system does factor in heavily when judging the compatibility of two people in a relationship. A person who has a strong belief in God is definitely going to raise her children differently, partake in different activities, and act differently in general. That is how I saw it when I ended my recent relationship.
But then why am I so confused about its importance? I found myself tonight thinking that it really wouldn't be so bad to marry a strong Christian and raise a family with her. I think that my morals and beliefs in raising a family are essentially the same as any Christians. It's not like I would raise my kid to be a killer. I would raise my children to respect all people. I would give them the choice on if they wanted to go to church with mommy or stay at home and help daddy build something. I have always thought that my children would be raised to have a choice on whether or not they would want to be involved in a religion. But could that happen if their mother was a Christian?
It's kind of like that whole thing about raising a bilingual child. Would you force him to learn english and, say, portuguese? I wouldn't, although some people would say that you should...higher test scores, etc. But I would only consider that if my parents weren't bilingual. Fortunately for me they are, eliminating the necessity for a bilingual grandchild. To me, this is a lot more cut and dried than the whole religion issue.
Spirituality and religion has always been a tough issue for me to think about and I handle it best by avoiding it or pushing it aside. Maybe its a fear that I may be wrong and go to hell for not going to church. Maybe its a jealousy of the religious because I am not able to walk around knowing that God is watching over me and protecting me.
I was thinking tonight that when we were together, we were good, which spawned ideas of getting back together. But then I think about how confused I get about the whole thing and just push it aside, like everything else I can't handle, and move on.
Tonight has been a night of intense thought for me. I rarely ever sit and think for long periods of time. I thought about my goals in life, my current situation in life and my past experiences in life. I thought about my career, my friends and family, and my more-than-friends relationship(s). The latter part (relationships) caused me to think the most.
I found myself reflecting on my most recent romantic involvement and what went wrong. We had it good in many ways: we enjoyed each others company, we always had a good time together, we both had basically the same ideals where family and friends were concerned, we both want and strive to be career oriented. There was, and still is, a lot of chemistry between us.
What didn't jive, at least for me, was her religious and spiritual place in life. I am no where near her level of spirituality and, what I sometimes call, belief of the unknown. She is a woman who takes her life and treats it as a vessel for God to do his bidding. Although I believe in God, it is to a much lesser extent than her; I flip-flop between a lax Catholic and an agnostic. After having a college experience where a majority of my friends were practicing Christians, I have seen the positives in having such a strong belief in God and his ways. I however, have not been able to become as "believing" as they were.
I ended the relationship because I knew that she and I would only be truly happy with people of our own spirituality. Our two different beliefs would lead us to two completely different ways of life.
But tonight, I was thinking. Why do you date someone? Why do you marry someone as opposed to someone else? Does your belief system really matter?
1. Why do you date someone?
The reason you date someone is because you take an interest in the person you are dating. Simple, but true. It could be because she is funny, it could be because you share a lot of hobbies or interests, or it could be because she is great in bed. You obviously see a quality in that person that you would like to see more of.
2. Why do you marry someone as opposed to someone else?
Compatibility on issues such as goals in life, raising a family; in general, the potential symbiosis of your lives. The love bit of a serious relationship will always be there regardless so when looking at this scientifically (which is kind of an oxy-moron, because there is nothing scientific about love), it can just drop out of the equation and basically becomes a non-issue. The dating process should expose a person to enough potential mates to where you know who you want and just go after her. The more you date, the more likely you are to come across your most compatible match.
3. Does your belief system really matter?
Although I do not believe that heavily in God and the bible, I do think that a persons belief system does factor in heavily when judging the compatibility of two people in a relationship. A person who has a strong belief in God is definitely going to raise her children differently, partake in different activities, and act differently in general. That is how I saw it when I ended my recent relationship.
But then why am I so confused about its importance? I found myself tonight thinking that it really wouldn't be so bad to marry a strong Christian and raise a family with her. I think that my morals and beliefs in raising a family are essentially the same as any Christians. It's not like I would raise my kid to be a killer. I would raise my children to respect all people. I would give them the choice on if they wanted to go to church with mommy or stay at home and help daddy build something. I have always thought that my children would be raised to have a choice on whether or not they would want to be involved in a religion. But could that happen if their mother was a Christian?
It's kind of like that whole thing about raising a bilingual child. Would you force him to learn english and, say, portuguese? I wouldn't, although some people would say that you should...higher test scores, etc. But I would only consider that if my parents weren't bilingual. Fortunately for me they are, eliminating the necessity for a bilingual grandchild. To me, this is a lot more cut and dried than the whole religion issue.
Spirituality and religion has always been a tough issue for me to think about and I handle it best by avoiding it or pushing it aside. Maybe its a fear that I may be wrong and go to hell for not going to church. Maybe its a jealousy of the religious because I am not able to walk around knowing that God is watching over me and protecting me.
I was thinking tonight that when we were together, we were good, which spawned ideas of getting back together. But then I think about how confused I get about the whole thing and just push it aside, like everything else I can't handle, and move on.
6.06.2002
Fifty-Seventh Entry
I have just learned that there is one other person who reads my blogs regularly...Mylinh. So that brings my total readership to 2 people. Look out SF Chronicle! I should put a counter on my blog page to see exactly how many people actually visit my blog page...ahhh, no.
Today I subbed at Wilson Elem. It was fine except for the fact that the class was bilingual(I don't speak Spanish) and that half of the class was misbehaving. I was super-tired too because I stayed up til 3am watching the World Cup, not thinking that I would get called in today. But I got through the day. Whew.
I decided to go back to my original page design because Mylinh said that it was too hard to read. I agreed and changed it back. I hope its back by now.
bye
I have just learned that there is one other person who reads my blogs regularly...Mylinh. So that brings my total readership to 2 people. Look out SF Chronicle! I should put a counter on my blog page to see exactly how many people actually visit my blog page...ahhh, no.
Today I subbed at Wilson Elem. It was fine except for the fact that the class was bilingual(I don't speak Spanish) and that half of the class was misbehaving. I was super-tired too because I stayed up til 3am watching the World Cup, not thinking that I would get called in today. But I got through the day. Whew.
I decided to go back to my original page design because Mylinh said that it was too hard to read. I agreed and changed it back. I hope its back by now.
bye
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